humor

"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "

Completly serious musings on beards and bears
The odd thing about beards is that throughout history, most men from the classiest gentleman to the least classy roughman have chosen to shave their chins and thus have the face of a tiny child. Meanwhile, the beard has always been a sexy option that provides ample advantage in day to day life. One can keep small objects in one’s beard, it insulates the face against extreme cold, a long enough beard can be used as a jumping rope for eight children or three adults. And as previously mentioned, they are extremely sexy. Nine out of people surveyed said that seeing a fine beard makes them feel both romantic and fluttery.
By gage ward5 years ago in Humans
A Little Help, A Lot of Love
I’m standing in the dark corridor, hesitating, swaying slightly on the spot as I think. There’s a soft, muffled bleep repeating in the distance and the hum of a floor sweeper outside. It’s 2am. The light rain tapping against the window at the end of the corridor blurs the cityscape into refracted fragments of orange, yellow, green, and red. A burst of blue signals the arrival of yet another ambulance in the docking bay below.
By Laura Ganis5 years ago in Humans
Friends Forever
It’s the most magnificent beard I’ve ever seen. In fact, to call it a mere beard is a travesty. Beautifully developed, expertly shaped, and lovingly manicured, it’s like a piece of art that’s actually worth paying for.
By Guy Sigley5 years ago in Humans
Shake It Off
Sometimes a man just has to have a caramel milkshake. Right now is one of those times. The café is what you might call “über chic.” With minimalist décor and wait staff more attractive than shampoo and conditioner models, I feel like the kid in corduroy when everyone else is wearing denim.
By Guy Sigley5 years ago in Humans
Greetings
As I round the corner, he bursts through the door like a king returning from a triumphant battle. This kind of confidence on exiting the men’s toilets gives me chest pains. My survival instincts kick in, but as I turn to flee his regal eyes trap me.
By Guy Sigley5 years ago in Humans
Barney and Juliet
“So, you’re a friend of Beth’s?” I say, leaning on the bar like I’m not terrified of small talk with women. “It’s just Beth, actually.”
By Guy Sigley5 years ago in Humans
Watch out for the ice
A feather was tickling my upper lip. I brushed it away with the back of my hand. It moved to my ear. I swiped it off. Then it moved to my right eye. I opened it. A fly buzzed around my head. I opened the other eye. Sunlight drenched me. I was in a prison cell. A very bright one. It smelt bad. No, it smelt horrendous, as if someone had…
By Bryan Allen5 years ago in Humans
BLESSED
BLESSED The addictive aroma of fresh brewed coffee was in the air at the old cafe’. I found a comfortable, overstuffed, brown leather chair, right next to the front window. It was summer time in West Virginia. The colorful flowers were all in bloom, making joy for all of the passers by. While drinking a cup of pure black coffee, I sat there pondering what to do about my life, as I stared out the window. Just then, a simply beautiful woman was entering the cafe’. She had lovely auburn hair with bright emerald green eyes. She smiled a genuine smile that warmed my heart. “Katie! Are you still teaching art classes next door at The Center?” asked the barista. “Yes, I am still teaching classes there.” said Katie. After Katie and the barista had a short conversation, while waiting on her white chocolate raspberry latte, she turned and noticed me. “Hi, my name is Noah.” Katie was drawn to me as I asked about her art classes. It was her day off of work. We sat and talked for 6 hours! It’s like we had known each another for years! Katie ended up inviting me to attend her art classes. We developed a strong bond of friendship over the next few months. We laughed, cried, and loved one another, in a few short months together. We were inseparable!
By Lynn Waite5 years ago in Humans
My Neighborhood Bandit
My neighborhood has a parking permit bandit. Like most people moving to a city with a vehicle makes me contractually obligated to be at war with the parking authority. I know on the grand scale of police offenses, giving out unnecessary parking permits is low on the list of offenses. Getting a ticket still stings. Seeing one of those neon orange envelopes can derail your whole mood. Massachusetts is one of the only states where if your car is in the process of being towed, and you claim it's your car, they can still decide to tow it. Boston is always near the top in terms of the cost of parking tickets, as well. Not to mention that spots are a finite resource. In terms of city planning, well, there was none. Boston is a city that was developed around the existing buildings, meaning that one-way streets pop out of nowhere, sometimes the streets feel so narrow you understand why it was made for horses and pedestrians. The city will spin you in circles and spit you out near the river. You can feel that Boston is the type of place that fell together, paved streets coming far after buildings. Even after obtaining a parking pass, two concerns can still pop up. Street cleaning and snow. If the snow is blocking your permit - ticket. In short, having a car in Boston is a nightmare. City living comes with these hyper-specific frustrations.
By KC Duma5 years ago in Humans
It's the Thought that Counts. Top Story - January 2021.
My current job involves the following tasks: Stand perfectly erect, clean shopping carts, greet the shoppers, and monitor the store capacity every hour. This is as mundane as life gets during the pandemic. The seemingly mechanical motions of my life make me crave any sort of spontaneous occurrence, but they only really make themselves known every month or so. This story depicts one of them, and it involves a good deed of course.
By JP Ocampo5 years ago in Humans
Do we need tongues in photos?
Can we leave the tongue trend in 2020? It’s a pose I remember seeing in photos from the old days of Rock and Roll. I was never a part of the Rock and Roll world myself, it is a popular culture to be a part of. a whole genre of music, with its own style and image. to be Rock and Roll means to be badass and ready for a wild fun time and make no mistake, this tongue trend is right up that alley so I totally understand why it is a part of the culture.
By Meaningful Anxiety5 years ago in Humans
Shrouds of Entitlement
2020 was a year like no other. A year of unprecedented change of life - nothing we’d ever experienced before. With these changes came adaptations to the way we dress, style and present ourselves. Suddenly there were masks, neck gaiters, work from home PJ bottoms and house slippers. On top of that, though, came new attitudes to wear - these attitudes came in many fashions - Shock, Confusion, Boredom, Stir Crazy... but worst of all, Shrouds of Entitlement.
By Liz Schubert 5 years ago in Humans