advice
Dating, married, single, divorced, and more. Advice on the relationships you have in life. Dear, Humans..
A Prophet is Not Welcome in His Hometown
It's right there in the Bible! Jesus said it himself! You've built yourself the American Dream, rose up the ladder and earned a fortune. The world accepts you as the executive professional that you really are. But the uncanny truth is that you are still the same small person when visiting the place where you grew up.
By Kelly Thundercloud5 years ago in Humans
11 common barriers to effective communication
Communication is an integral part of our life and plays an important role in daily living. We communicate with our family members, colleagues, friends, strangers, etc. to get things done, to express our love, to ask for something, to understand others, to get new ideas, to appreciate, to learn etc. We are living in the age of communication, and people who communicate effectively are the ones who succeed better in life.
By Mann Ghatt 5 years ago in Humans
Relationship Goals
Have you had your share of heartbreak? Sure. Everyone has. Some are worse than others. Those heartbreaks stick with people, changing them into what they are now. It can be both good and bad, depending on how the person responds to it. Discussing the avoidance of heartbreak, both partners need to understand each other. Whether it is personality or emotional, both parties need to understand each other thoroughly. Communication is key.
By Julee Bliss5 years ago in Humans
The Art and Importance of Positivity Resonance
When I was younger, I believed the same obvious lie that so many of us swallowed after watching too many Disney movies: True Love is effortless. If it’s meant to be, it will be. If you’ve found your soulmate, you’re guaranteed a happily ever after.
By Zulie Rane5 years ago in Humans
5 Communication Habits of Happy Long-Lasting Couples
I used to struggle to communicate my emotions. I’ve spent almost 3 years in a relationship that made me unhappy, and the first time I ever mentioned it to my boyfriend at the time was when I told him that I wanted a breakup.
By Alice White5 years ago in Humans
The Lost Art of Mentorship
I once heard my generation be called the Lost Boys Generation. Men struggling to find a proper mentor or guide to help point them in the right direction of where they should go in life. I was in the same boat. I had an idea of the kind of man that I wanted to become I just didn't know how to get there. Looking around the men in my world that were in the position to mentor me and put me on the right path I realized that they didn't not have the skill set or the desire to be an effective leader and mentor. So I needed to search. I needed to search the media, film, and hollywood for someone that really represented the man that wanted to grow into. I was 16 years old and I dreaded that time of day when I would hear the keys jingle in the key hole and the door would open and their he would be staring a whole right through me. He would say the same thing everyday. "Did you walk the dogs and do your homework?" In the most unwelcoming cold voice that he can muster. That would be the extent of what he would say to me everyday. He would remain silent and not speak to me or my mother at dinner. Even when the dogs snuggled up to him looking for affection he would get frustrated and tell them "Screw off!" When dinner was over he would remain silent and then isolate himself in his bedroom the rest of the night. That was basically the relationship dynamic that I had with my step father. I wish we had a better bond. However another part of me did not want that because I knew he was not a man that I can admire, look up to, or be mentored by. He was just not built to be a mentor. His children from his previous marriage said the same thing about him, he was not the father they needed him to be. As I looked around in other parts of my life there were not a lot of men that had mentor qualities. However during that period of my life it did not seem like a huge issue, it just seemed normal to me not having fatherly guidance. When I was young I was an extremely impressionable child. I knew what I looked up to in men and what I imagined myself to be and I was consciously and subconsciously emulating their behavior and vibe. As I have aged into my 30's I have come to gain a different perspective on mentorship. I always used to think that mentorship dynamic was natural human dynamic but I have come to realize that some people are not born to be mentors or mentored. In our hunter gather past it was the standard dynamic between parents and their children, especially fathers and son. When the young boy finally reach an age where the father felt that he had what it took to be taken on hunt with the other men, the father would mentor the young in hunting strategy and tactics. Nowadays men are too busy playing videogames or glued to their phone to either bother teaching their children anything. From the dynamic that I had with my step father I knew that he was not the man to guide me through life's challenges. In 2005 our relationship fell apart and he left the home. I struggling for a few years to find meaning and purpose for myself. In 2008 I joined the Army hoping to find some sense of purpose and guidance that I needed. For a while in the Army and did find it and the army was a great experience but the fire for it slowly burnt out. It was not quite what I was searching for. A couple years later at a pro wrestling event in 2012 which I was wrestling in. I was the first match on the show. I finished my very short five minute match. After the show wrestlers gave the kids a chance to meet them and photos taken with their favorite wrestlers. I kept my distance with this because I did not think anyone would be interested in my performance on the show. I was a newbie still learning the ropes of pro wrestling. I was at the coffee bar buying a coffee. While I was paying the cashier and felt a tug on pants from behind me. I turned around looked down and saw a small boy no older then 5 looking up at me. His eyes were wide and he had a huge smile on his face. I looked up and saw his father. His father looked at me and said. "My son loved you tonight you were his favorite wrestler". I was stunned and could not really believe what I was hearing. Me? I thought. "But I was terrible?" I said to the father laughing while I said it. The father laughed to "Yes, you were terrible but something you did made a connection with my son." The young boy asked if he can have my autograph. I did not think I was worthy enough to be giving children autographs at a wrestling show but I did it anyway because I saw the happiness that it brought this boy. Before he left the young boy gave me a hug and said "Thank you, you were my favorite wrestler tonight". The boy left with his father. I was emotionally hung up on that moment for about a week. It amazed me how you can have an impact on someone life and not even realize your doing it. Even if it was a very brief moment that interaction meant the world to me. It made me realize that being a positive role model and or being viewed as a male mentor is really important to me and from that moment on I new this was something I need to build upon prioritize and make my life's works as being a role model/mentor. People in the world that value money the most are the ones that have grown up in poverty because they never had money and they know its worth. I know the value and the importance of being a male role model and mentor because I never had it. From what I have seen and experienced it has become a lost art form. Most people these days are all consumed with themselves and focused and what they are generating or not generating into their own lives. True mentorship comes from a genuine desire to improve the lives of a younger generation. Not for ego or acknowledgement but from contributing to make the world a better place then they found it.
By Logan Rider5 years ago in Humans
5 Things I Would Tell My Younger Self
When I was younger, I thought that the world was mine. I thought that every decision I decided to take, would not affect the future, every action I took, would not change my future, and even though with some of the decisions I made, it did not make a difference in my future, there are many actions and decisions that I took that I know my life would have been differently if I had known them or had someone to think wisely before taking those decisions. There are so many things that I wish I would have known when I was younger that I know would have helped me better myself for my future now. I know many of us young women go through similar struggles and situations that we would have wanted someone older to tell and warn us about, and I know that many young women go through it now. I want to be able to be that person for you and for whoever else needs it because I know that if I could go back in time and tell myself these 5 things, I would have been better prepared for life, relationships, and even learned how to be nicer to myself.
By Andrea Minjarez5 years ago in Humans
The Best Advice I've Ever Received
I'm an awkward human being. I was an awkward kid, I'm an awkward adult and with luck, I'll be an awkward old lady someday. As a child, I was constantly bombarded with the ways that I was socially delayed, behind others. Other kids had friendships, sleepovers, the attention of others, and I could barely stammer my way through a conversation. Other kids had grace, charm and hand-eye coordination and I barely spoke, got lost in books and let anxiety get the best of me.
By Kayla Bruner5 years ago in Humans
A LIE IS EASIER THAN THE TRUTH
I looked back in my dating life and noticed a pattern with the guys I dated. They always told the truth. Wow, who knew? But I just did not recognize it at first. It took me having to examine some things to figure it out. You know when you get to that point in trying to figure out why you have had such shitty luck with men. So, you start debating about whether you should start dating women. Then you depressingly realize you like men too much for that. Even though you cannot stand them half the time. But as I looked back at my relationships, I was always told the truth. In some shape, form, or fashion. They always reveal at some point who they really were. I just was not paying attention. For example, you know those conversations when your lying-in bed or sitting on the couch you all are doing your own thing and then out of the blue, they say the most random thing. You tell yourself they do not know what their saying or they do not mean that “YES THEY DO”. Every word of it. Most of the time, we brush it off or deflect to avoid from having an argument. Sometimes, you might even question them after they say it and they say, oh nothing never mind, or what are you talking about I did not say anything. That means you heard me, I said what I said, and I hope you got every word of it, Lol. I had this one relationship where we would tell each other our perfect mate or someone we could see ourselves dating. We would name at least 5 people that would match that description and why. Let’s just say stuff got real. So, I said mine and the reasons why. All the guys I named, and their reasons would make the ‘Perfect Man’. After I said what I said it was all these questions and the side eye looks. To me that was hilarious. Then it was his turn and he named them and then came the reason. I got quiet put my head down and look and said Umm, sweetie I do not fit any of those descriptions. See at least he could relate to some of my picks. Then I told him, they are all on your list because of looks and nothing of importance. Your reasons are because they are fine and rich. Ok, I am fat and broke. So, why are you with me again. His answer was because your beautiful and smart. I said aww, you are so sweet (Deflecting) I know your probably saying: what does that have to do with what your partner is trying to say? Honestly, I felt like that was something so little and it did not mean anything either. But I guess it can be the littlest things. That can spill over into something big. So, later came the let us work out together and start eating right. I was like ok I finally got someone to look out for me. That only lasted so long on his end of course. Then, there was the go out for this promotion to make more money. I said it would have me at crazy hours and I have my family to think about. He would come with the, you need spend more time doing things for yourself. So, I asked are you happy in this relationship? He said, yes why? I said because it seems like you are trying to change me into what you want me to be. He responded and said no I just want us to live a long life together and be successful. I said I understand that. But when you say us that mean you and me. But it seems like I am the only one putting in the work for us. So, again what is the real reason we are together? Because I love you. Yeah, right later I found out the real reason was that it was convenient. Let us just say that relationship did not work out. I spent years telling myself what I wanted his words and actions to mean versus what he really was trying to say. So, everyone listens to your partner, “Every word”. They might be telling you something particularly important. This might save a lot of time and heartache in the end.
By Cassandra Smith5 years ago in Humans
