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Men and Women Communicate in a Different Way

The communication patters of men and women have numerous differences.

By Mark RangelPublished 6 years ago 7 min read

The communication patters of men and women have numerous differences. Currently, the scientific evidence suggests that men and women indeed use different communication styles. Men and women have different sets of rules of verbal interaction, use different grammatical and lexical methods; therefore, in some sense, they form two different communication communities. Modern science takes a keen interest in the social conditioning of language and communication. While studying the influence of social characteristics on communication, gender must be taken into account. Gender differences in communication are caused to a certain extent by both inborn psychological characteristics corresponding to sex and the influence of society. Focusing on the differences between male and female models of communication, this paper aims to analyze the article entitled “Are Different Patterns of Communication in Women and Men Innately Determined?” published in the book Taking Sides: Clashing Views in Gender by J. White.

From the research of the https://best-writing-service.net/ , it becomes obvious that men and women have inherent requirements of their nature. First, there are biological differences that are related to the speech patterns. The communication center in the brain is much bigger in women than in men. Women tend to be better in using language than men; they pay special attention to the words, read between the lines, and pay attention to the body language of people, including their facial expressions. However, in addition to the biological and innate differences between people, there is a separation of the social roles, forms of action, differences in behavior, and emotional characteristics. Thus, gender is a set of social and cultural norms that society requires from people according to their biological sex. The style of communication is closely linked with the need to support the adoption of the normative culture canon of masculinity or femininity. The men's style requires them to hide their weaknesses and emphasize the achievements and high aspirations. At the same time, the female style is designed to reduce the social distance and the establishment of psychological intimacy with others. This standard makes adolescent boys hide such features and problems that look ‘feminine’, for example, shyness and it reduces the level of their overall self-disclosure.

The article “Are Different Patterns of Communication in Women and Men Innately Determined?” refers to Deborah Tannen's parallels and contrasts between male and female models of speech. Without this understanding, both sexes are doomed to blame each other constantly for being unwilling to understand, to listen, and to pay attention to other's requests. The more people are aware of the differences in the use of female and male styles of language, the less complaints they will hear. For most women, the conversation is a means of convergence and the development of relationships, while for most men, the conversation usually becomes a means of preserving their independence and their status in the hierarchy of social order.

The analyzed article focuses on gender linguistics that defines the term ‘genderlect’ as the set of differences between male and female language, verbal behavior rules, strategies, and tactics of speech in men and women in different communicative situations. It becomes clear that men and women use different communication styles and strategies in speech, which makes genderlect, a sociolinguistic term, reflecting male and female speech, an actually existing social phenomenon. There are certain features, peculiar only to men or women. For example, women are more non-conflict and emotional; the main themes in conversations among them are the subjects of family, relationships, fashion, and parenting as well as art and literature. While communicating, women are more detailed than men, and they often refer to movies, books, and personal experience. It is also observed that women use more introductory words than men, and women are more likely to use ‘high words’ in their speech. Psychologists distinguish such a feature as the presence of exaggeration and generalization in women's speech. As for men's speech, precision and concreteness are more peculiar. The main topic of conversation among men is business, hunting, fishing, and so on, as well as innovative development and politics. Men often refer to the authorities, and, according to psychologists, these authorities are most often males. Men frequently use ironic and professional vocabulary. Their speech is characterized by the use of huge introductory words, with the predominance of verbs over other parts of speech. Linguists also claim that the use of swear words occurs among men more often than among women. According to some observations, female speech is characterized by the use of words of the uncertainty such as ‘maybe’, ‘probably’, and so on. Men normally use adverbs like ‘certainly’, ‘sure’, and ‘exactly’ to show their absolute certainty of the correctness of their opinions.

The term ‘verbal behavior’, or ‘communication behavior’, defined in the article, means the totality of speech acts and their forms that are considered especially in social and communicative aspect. Differences in the communication behavior of men and women are reflected in what stories they tell and topics they discuss. Men talk mostly about themselves and about how they become winners out of any situation. It speaks of their self-confidence and self-sufficiency. Women, on the contrary, talk about others, and they often do not speak about their ‘heroic feats’ but about their stupidity and forgetfulness. It is easier for women to switch, change roles in the act of communication. On the contrary, it is much more difficult for men to switch in the act of communication, and, carried away by the topic of conversation or dialogue, they often fail to respond to other replicas that are not associated with it. When it comes to keeping the conversation, for men, conversation is the exchange of information, while for women it is the interaction. Women tend to ask questions more often than men. Questions are usually set for the sole purpose of continuing a conversation. A woman knows how to listen carefully for much longer than a man. A woman has more polite replicas and a more assertive verbal behavior. She is more prone to the requirements in the form of requests. In terms of the status, men tend to manipulate their status, while women aim at establishing close relations. Male speech is also characterized by the influence of such factor as a profession. Men commonly use professional terminology in a casual conversation. Women tend to use more simple and clear words, and these words must be clear to their interlocutors. Verbal communication behavior of men and women differ greatly. Men are usually immersed in the course of their thoughts, and if interested in talking, they do not react to any environment. Women, carrying on a conversation more openly, are very sensitive to the surroundings in general.

Verbal behavior is closely connected with gender stereotypes. The devalued status of women has always had a great influence on their communication patterns. A non-aggressive, friendly verbal behavior of women strengthens the existing expectations in society that women are weaker, insecure, and less competent. According to feminist linguistics, typically the female tactics of speech behavior, such as flexibility and cooperativeness, gives the impression of insecurity and incompetence. If women use the male strategy, namely aggressiveness and low cooperativeness, they will be perceived as unfeminine or offensive. This behavior also often leads to communication failure.

The article also highlights the influence of feminization on the equalization of communication behavior and the creation of a rather gender-balanced language. Nowadays, the social roles of men and women become gradually equalized. Language and communication is one of the aspects, in which people express their sexual identity in this world. Women's speech is increasingly accompanied with the demands of various forms of politeness and the so-called “formal limiters”. For men, the most important task is the adoption of their own leading position in the competition and establishing leading status roles. Studies show that men, when they talk to each other, very rarely interrupt each other during the dialogue. At the same time, when a woman decides to show her competence in the presence of men, they take it as a challenge and an aggression from a woman's side. The nature of communication between men and women depends on many different factors, the study of which happens now. Linguistics is a developing science, as with the passage of time, social roles of men and women chane.

To sum up, there are still various views on whether different patterns of communication in women and men are innately determined or acquired. There is no doubt that some inherent biological and psychological features determine the differences in communication behavior between men and women. However, today, in the connection with the equation of social roles of men and women, the distinction in the communication behavior is not so clearly seen as in previous centuries. Women's speech has become more ‘masculine’ and technical. It has been noticed that middle-aged and older people follow a conservative linguistic behavior. Communication behavior of the elderly women tends to look ‘feminine’. Elderly men, on the contrary, strongly emphasize their ‘masculine’ communication behavior, using crude expressions. However, because of feminization, the new generation violates those rules of distinctly masculine or feminine communication models. This observation gives the possibility to say that sociocultural reasons are more likely to determine the differences of communication patterns in men and women. The differences that have been innately determined disappear in the process of modernization of society.

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