Secrets
Think I had gotten Catfished Almost 20 years ago.
Many may have checked out dating sites to see how things work there. When you are single you want to meet someone. Some people say they work. Well I know firsthand you have to be very careful, men and women get used by creeps every day. Lose money, lose family over the things they do for this creep. I saw an episode of Dr. Phil one time a lady sent so much money and she still thought it was love. It did not matter what people told her. I think she was still unsure after the show found this guy to be a fraud.
By Kerrie G.Diaz4 years ago in Confessions
The Last Train
The Last Train I wasn’t a depressive. I was a “wounded optimist.” Once, I even found the emotional strength to join a few dating apps and dream about a long, romantic vacation in Europe. But alas, disappointment would eventually knock on my door, and I would answer. I was sick and tired of the random visits, but it always came with wine… so I let it in.
By Maria Rose 4 years ago in Confessions
A Stick of Gum
It all started because of a stick of gum. Something so small, so simple, and my life was forever changed. My older sister had been working for a temp agency for a few years and they had been struggling to find workers. I was in my senior year of high school and wanted to start saving money for when I was away at college in the fall. She heard about a 3rd shift opening with a factory. The schedule was determined by the employee. All we had to do was call them at the beginning of the week and tell them when we could work. It was a dream job. Little did I know, it would slowly turn into a nightmare.
By Lenny Jacobs4 years ago in Confessions
But you’re so pretty!!
I’ve always been a “pretty girl” to people. Some even say beautiful. My energy can be radiant, and I’m always mindful of how I make people feel. I’ve l learned to be this way, mostly by experience. Growing up I was extremely sensitive. My family would yell at me and tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself. I hated that feeling because I knew that when I was sad, it was different for me. I’d feel it in my whole body. In my bones and muscles. Once I became an adult and went through some more traumatic experiences, I learned that mental health was the underlying issue for me. Most people will look at me and assume I have it all together. I’m not always talkative so it comes off rude. Now what almost anyone around me doesn’t know is I suffer from depression, anxiety and panic disorder. So when I’m quietly biting my nails or shaking my leg, I’m trying to contain the feeling of everything in the moment. I do not have the ability to maintain friendships or relationships. I’m not rude I’m afraid!! I am not just deciding to not engage. My anxiety just pauses me. I have come across some people in my life who have not made that any easier. I feel pain differently than the people who have been around me. Because of this, and the overwhelming desire for someone to love me willingly I have become a doormat. I have accepted abuse physically, mentally and emotionally. And I fought and worked to keep those people, because in my mind, if I could convince them I was enough then I would win. Little did I know how much I was losing. Every time I allowed someone to mistreat me, I lost a little bit of myself and my mind. And when I do walk away , finally, I still will be the one taking it so hard. Mostly because, I know it’s not good for me but going back to that lonely feeling, scares me more than tolerating the abuse. Those feelings are normal to me. I grew up with them. But being lonely is my biggest fear and my greatest reality. And boy, do those panic attacks know exactly when to hit you. I know most times my reactions are not normal, and no matter how much I try to tell myself that, I never win. I still go through the painful, miserable moments. So, see when I meet people who want to be in my life, I have to tell them the ugly truth, because I no longer have anything left for someone to take. And even when you’re honest, you still have to be careful. Because some people will literally enter your life to trigger you. And these are mostly people with mental health issues that they refuse to address. So they manipulate and project all their insecurities onto someone they feel is weaker than they are. I’m a mom of three (one special needs) and half the time I barely have the energy for them. Especially when something that my brain registers as traumatic, happens. People say they support you when you explain these things to them. But when the times comes you’re left to deal with it by yourself. That can add to already overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I put the energy I have into caring for my children, and once the day is over there is nothing for me. I’m drained. So how do you take care of yourself and not be selfish to your kids? Right now I can’t figure it out. What people see as a pretty girl who can have her way, I see myself as someone incapable of being loved. Pretty can’t help me here.
By Chantel Rivers 4 years ago in Confessions
Ripped
I pull into my driveway after working 11 hours, my hands still raw from cleaning the entire house before work, and the thought of getting out of the car and going inside has me paralyzed. The lump in my throat swells and the tears welling up in my eyes stings my already raw eyes. In between the exhaustion of a day that starts at 5 a.m. and has finally ended at 1 a.m. my "husband" managed to find the time to accidentally send me a text that clearly wasn't meant for me, after he called to tell me that he should have a 4 course meal for dinner, and not home cooked pizzas. The phone call was beyond brutal, berating and just plain hateful. Then he hung up on me. When the notification popped up, I thought it would be the usual "im sorry, work was stressful" line. You can imagine my surprise to read "wish i was kissing you, too." Normally, I would have rationalized it and felt better. Not today, though. My face burned with embarrassment and disbelief. The text made zero sense to me. We hadn't even spoken today, outside of the hateful dinner issue. In that moment, I slumped to the floor of the employee bathroom and sobbed. He must have figured out his mistake, because his ringtone chimed over my sobs. As much as I couldn't stand even the thought of his voice, I answered. Sniffling, and still reeling. "What," I said undeniably crushed. " Oh, I was trying to talk text to you and it cut off before i could say sorry." his voice nervous and filled with deceit.
By Candice4 years ago in Confessions
Have you lost her?
Most women, when going through breakups or "breaks".... they continue to hold on tight to that person that meant so much to them. They hold onto the hope that he will never stop loving her, the hope that they can eventually work it out. They try different ways to make themselves feel better, to help them forget about their pain, to free their wandering mind. They do this all while continuously putting themselves through sometimes unbearable torture. It's a very tragic cycle that we cause.
By Stephanie Green4 years ago in Confessions
Wormholing Commandos
Spacetime manipulation commandos in modern day warfare: my experience Before telling about my experiences as a wormholing commando, I'd first like to thank you for reading this. I will write about my experiences in short articles on a weekly basis providing information and answering any reasonable questions associated. Let's begin with the general structure of agencies to better understand future articles.
By Danny Young4 years ago in Confessions
The Balance of Life
Life is filled with so much mystery; You never know what will happen in the next chapters. I close my eyes, clear my mind and feel like a baby craving all the love I ever wanted from my mother. I wanted to cry so bad that I wished it could be real. I sometimes wish I could see what she could see in me. Everyday it feels like betrayal, a punch in the face because their were flaws that has not been forgiven. It is very hard to determine what emotion I am supposed to have because she is my mother. In my mom's mind, I think I am a mistake, stranger, a disguise of what exactly? But in God's eyes, I feel a purpose. A purpose to live everyday. Why do we question the unspoken? Because we are afraid, afraid to figure out what is happening in our current generation. Why am I unable to figure out who I am meant to be? All my life, preferably teenager, my mom never gave me interests that I could not connect myself to. My grandmother gave me something that I have not seen in this world in a long time, that is giving back to the community.
By Quilla Chambers4 years ago in Confessions
Fearing the unknown
It’s always hard to think about the future when you have so much on your mind. When you have so many things that weigh on you it’s hard to move past everything and focus on the future and be positive. You put on a smile and make sure everybody thinks you’re OK but really all you wanna do is cry. When you don’t know if you’ll ever heal and move on. You don’t know if you’ll be able to do the things you used to do but you’re forced to smile and show everybody that you’re just fine. “I promise I’m just fine.”
By kaitlyn Olson4 years ago in Confessions
