Dating
New Year’s 🎉
The year was 2010 and I was still friends with my Ex I was in love with him, so in love I ok’d just being his friend. See he and I have a lot of history, he actually saved my life. And although the relationship didn’t work out, we remained friends. Back then I had very strict rules. Never sleep with your Ex. That is actually a good rule to live by, less mistakes. However, if you still have feelings for your Ex, perhaps hanging out with him is not a good idea. You have to guard your heart. At that time I did not understand so I was ok with just being his friend. I’m sure he was ok with that too as we always had a good time when hanging out. Tommy has always been respectful when it came to making moves on a chick. I don’t understand how he could be a player. We will label him, the respectful player. We have been broken up longer than what we were together yet he never really made a move on me. Now that I see things a bit differently, I suspect he was intimidated by me. I will be sharing stories on this Blog and you decide! Was he intimidated or was he a respectful player? Either way I adore him, I would not be here today if it weren’t for him plucking me out of Ricks’s Cabaret on 33rd Street, NYC. Like I mentioned previously, we have a lot of history together. By 2010, I had landed my very first hotel job and was doing pretty well.. so I thought. This was the beginning of my depression. See he pulled me out of a very dark life and I failed to get help for myself mentally so I began to fall into depression. What I used to do for a living prior to 2010 embarrassed me, I was ashamed of myself and rather than get help I thought I was fine because I now had a regular job. Not a good move, once you have a life changing experience you must speak to someone of your hurt/trauma. What I did during my dark times in life caused trauma. The only person I hurt was myself because nobody else knew of that life, well Tommy knew what I was doing.. he met me at Rick’s. I am thankful for him because of him pulling me out I have reached my maximum potential. I had no idea I was so intelligent. Insecurities and a past history of trauma will limit your thinking into believing you’re not worthy. I lived a life of sadness until I met Tommy. For once I had someone who genuinely cared about me and did not try to make sexual advances toward me like everyone else? Even though I met him in a Strip Club he still respected me? WTF? Respectful player I tell you because we had our ups and downs. He played me, I played him. It went both ways but we decided to call it quits sometime in 2009-2010. He still wanted to be in my son’s life and I told him, if he were to be in my son’s life he could never leave or be in and out.. Tommy kept his word and stayed in my son’s life for years until I got into a serious (controlling) relationship in 2015. I have no regrets of the past as Mark Twain said, history doesn’t repeat itself but it rhymes. I needed to be in that controlling relationship to learn about my dark side and Toxic Family. Now that controlling relationship is in the past, I can share stories of my experiences and my beloved Ex who once upon a time saved my life. The memories bring a smile to my face and I cherish our time together. It’s a blessing that I am a writer because all of my journals will come to life and I will take you back in time. New York City, the city that never sleeps. The City where you can get anything you’d like so long as the price is right. And I will introduce to you the man who saved me, Mr. Thomas Edward Aldinger. Ironworker, Veteran, Player and Budlight lover. Yup he’s got plenty of stories too! So it’s New Year’s Eve and my home was the place to be. My mother and I cooked, my brother was home and brought his girlfriend along with his friend George. We’re having a good time drinking and eating traditional Puerto Rican food. Pernil y arroz con gandules and the list goes on. Soon as it hit midnight we hopped on the train toward NYC. Of course there were no cabs as it had just turned 1/1/11. So what do we do? We hailed a horse and carriage. We were drunk on a horse and carriage screaming HAPPY NEW YEAR! to everyone that passed us. The place to be was, The Mean Fiddler over on 47th street. We danced, we partied but I was longing to see my “friend” aka crush Tommy, the respectful player who was at another bar in NYC. So we took the party to where Tommy was. We had a blast but what I remember mostly was, me pushing myself on to my Ex! We were having some drinks and I had enough of the pretend bullshit. I put my hand on his chest at the bar and pushed up on him. I kissed him! We partied until the wee hours in the morning and took it to his apartment where I crashed at about 11am. Nothing happened because Tommy is a respectful player and my rule is never have sex with an Ex. We have lots of similarities I guess, but we crashed at 11 am and I was up by 1pm to go to work at the hotel. Although neither of us got laid, this was the best New Year I ever had. We love to laugh and dance so I am grateful I can now share stories of our past. Looking at the younger generation of today, I can say this.. ya’ll can’t hang. Not like how we did in our youth. Tommy would leave the bar to be at work at 7am, as an Ironworker and I could function on two hours rest. I do not see that in today’s youth. A security guard, not even 30 years old would fall asleep in the beginning of his shift at my recent job and I’m like WTF??! I hope in sharing my story it teaches folks to do better, even in party situations be respectful and be responsible. Now that’s partying like a G.
By The Vibe Podcast 4 years ago in Confessions
A Promise Ring Will Surely Do, Until We Say I Do
I walked into a dive bar. The kind of bar you almost wish didn’t exist. But then I found my old friend from high school sitting at the bar. This is what happens when you never leave your hometown, a hometown with very few options. I sat down and bought myself a drink. Small talk surely ensued.
By Susan Eileen 4 years ago in Confessions
Dating Diary of a 40 Something Year Old . Top Story - November 2021.
It was a beautiful fall afternoon when my daughter picked me up to grab a cup of coffee and rant all about our current boy topics. I had just "kicked out" my latest greatest unhappily ever after, so I was feeling a little on the snarky side. I shared my questions regarding the life I was providing him and confusion as to why he never wanted to spend time with me. Well, outside of the "brown chicken, brown cow"... wanting sex from me. Even that had become almost a never and when it did, it was becoming more of a chore than something that was fun or special. My daughter laughed at me and said, "he is a hobosexual Mom"!
By Crystal Rae4 years ago in Confessions
Coffee Slut
I had to work at a factory in Walla Walla, Washington for a year when I got out of the Army to get state residency, so I could go to college. Then I started at Walla Walla Community College, whose legend described it as the "second best junior college in America" but that's another story (I've heard that about multiple junior colleges and am pretty sure it's just an urban myth kind of thing).
By J.D. Bradley4 years ago in Confessions
Burning Affection
The chemistry awakens the feelings speak so loudly and the laughter is so admirable. Having my mind thinking it’s to good to be true like maybe a motive is responsible for his actions. I underestimate his generosity quite often knowing he has a very uplifting spirit. Having the ability to influence my mind so carefully it’s starting to become familiar. His aggression appears in a form that is good not harmful, it’s demanding in away that is dainty. My feelings are a showcase with sarcasm being the star but behind the scenes my sanity comes forth. He’s very understanding under the circumstances that I can be a (bitch) Black.Intelligent .Thurl.Chick.Hindered, when I don’t get my way. I salute the relationship we invested in while being numb to the fact that we were actually building something so special, something so unexpected, something so real. No strings attached to this duo nothing but fate and faith behind the wheel steering in every direction. I believe everything happens for a reason but I question the reasoning behind being able to be in the presence of his beautiful unique soul. His positive outlook on life inspires me to be greater. Love and Lust plays a very important role in this two ring circus. Lusting for desires we should not have while loving one another like we are destined to be together. When he speaks to me it sounds as if he’s singing. His tone so vigorously it hypnotizes my mind sending it to an alternate state. Our fantasy involves a lot of hope and integrity while some might patronize the possibility that what we have might actually be possible. The attention that I deserve he doesn’t mind showering me with so much more. He says “I’m important” so why not treat me as so. I don’t fight against my heart it’s to much to bare so I surrender and what ever it is that’s supposed to happen I’ll let rise to our horizon. What is meant to be may not be. Our relationship is like the very air we breathe, fresh and sometimes contaminated. Addicted to who he is, he’s my controlled substance that keeps me calm with a constant frown upside down. The passion will never cease, the sex will increase with raging affection of love circulating through all our imperfections. What we have is intense and 100% authentic. The motion picture is still to come and I’m waiting patiently for it to be done. Affection! Passion! All in one.
By Janelle Griggs 4 years ago in Confessions
