satire
Politicians provide us with all of the comedy gold. We're only mere curators.
The Silent Superweapon
Editorial Note: This satirical essay is a speculative exploration of administrative overreach, government efficiency rhetoric, and the unintended consequences of digitized control. Inspired by the spirit of The Twilight Zone, it invites readers to imagine a world where a new bureaucracy becomes the engine of dystopia. It is not a declaration of fact, but a provocative thought experiment. License is taken to use the real life Department of Government Efficiency name as it is current in the public ethos.
By Lanny Newville8 months ago in The Swamp
Minions Taxed at Border, Go Absolutely Bananas
The cost of The Minions to enter America has gone up 100%. “They took our jobs! They took our box office dollars! Now they must pay!” declared JD Vance, who has long accused Minions of “undermining American values” by being funny without speaking English.
By Scott Christenson🌴9 months ago in The Swamp
The Ultimate Manifesto of Absurd Revolution
Part I: The Stage is Set, the Play is Mad Act I: The Absurdity Overture Reality, as we've been sold it, is a limited-run stage production directed by a committee of gibbering baboons. The set design is... ambitious. Picture this: gated communities sprouting like gleaming, chrome-plated fungi next to favelas cobbled together from desperation and discarded dreams. A smiling cartoon dog, perpetually sipping coffee, while the ozone layer develops a comb-over and the polar bears start taking bets on which of us goes extinct first.
By Abigail Goldwater9 months ago in The Swamp
India is Done Playing Nice: A Not-So-Subtle Approach to Diplomacy
In what can only be described as the diplomatic equivalent of flipping the table during a chess match, India has apparently reached the end of its legendary patience following the tragic Pahalgam attack in Kashmir. World leaders like US President Donald Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin have condemned the massacre that claimed 28 lives-a statement so obvious it barely qualifies as news. The timing of the attack during US Vice President J.D. Vance's visit to India seems almost theatrically convenient, as if terrorists consult international diplomatic calendars when planning their atrocities.
By The INFORMER10 months ago in The Swamp
The Police Should Go Nuclear!. Content Warning.
NOTE: This article is purely satire. In the news, there is this talk about defunding the police. It would be bad on many counts because criminals can get off Scott Free for their crimes. Should the bureaucrats get their way, the police will be helplessly undermined by severe budget cuts. Now, this would put cities and towns all over America in peril. However, I have to say there is a solution to this defunding of the police.
By Halden Mile10 months ago in The Swamp
The Gristle – Issue 3
EXCLUSIVE: BBC Whistleblower Confirms Corporation's Government Bias LONDON — A BBC insider has told The Gristle that Senior News Editors rate stories with a colour-coded 'Threat Level Matrix' based on the likely level of government embarassment.
By Addison Alder10 months ago in The Swamp
The Gristle – Issue 2
BREAKING: Independence Day As Reeves Plans To Sell Scotland For Tariff Concessions LONDON — Chancellor Rachel Reeves has unveiled radical plans to sell the UK's northernmost nation to the United States in exchange for tariff concessions.
By Addison Alder10 months ago in The Swamp
The Gristle – Issue 1
NHS Replaces Mental Health Services with Hug from Holographic Wes Streeting Facing a mounting mental health crisis, the government has unveiled a bold new therapeutic initiative: a soothing, three-minute embrace from a hologram of Health Secretary Wes Streeting.
By Addison Alder10 months ago in The Swamp
Shocking Footage: Tufts Student Rumeysa Ozturk Handcuffed by U.S. Authorities
A shocking video has surfaced showing Tufts University graduate student Rumeysa Ozturk being handcuffed by U.S. authorities in what many are calling an unjustified arrest. The footage, which quickly went viral on social media, captures the moment plainclothes officers restrained Ozturk on a Somerville sidewalk as bystanders watched in disbelief.
By Bevy Osuos11 months ago in The Swamp
