depression
It is not just a matter of feeling sad; discover an honest view of the mental, emotional and physical toll of clinical depression.
Cigars to Save Lives
Depression is a funny thing. There is no big defining moment where you finally conquer your inner demons. More like a lot of small battles that don't seem to matter that add up. I remember back when. I would wake up look at a few bottles of pills and think not today, today will be better. I never actually believed and was convinced I was lying to myself because don't you know there is no deception like self-deception. Every day before I went to sleep, I looked at those bottles thinking that I would wait till morning to decide after a night's sleep. In truth I don't know how long this cycle went. I don't even remember when it stopped. The thought of death was always present in the background. I was isolated not talking to anyone. I was subconsciously trying to lessen the impact my death would have. It's weird you think if you push everyone away, they won't be sad at your death. While not trying to plug the idea of smoking it was cigars that caused the first many victories. I'm a smoker and someone reached out to me to meet for cigars. Now if you don't know anything about smoking actual cigars hand rolled make cigarettes look pathetic by comparison. How could I pass it up? Something about the extra nicotine made me more relaxed and let me enjoy myself for a while. It started to be a thing to meet for dinner and then talk over cigars. Small amounts of human contact helped distract from the feelings making me depressed but, not enough to make them go away entirely. The next small victory came from someone new being hired at work. Now this whole time I had learned to act normal in public. I normally let myself only let my guard down by myself. I don't why I wanted to spend more time with them. I imagine it was probably a mix of those cigar meetings made me realize how much I missed human contact, wanting to spend time with someone close to my own age, and the fact she was almost contagiously happy most days. I even caught I genuinely smiling around her instead of faking feeling happy. It's funny someone can affect someone without realizing it. Not going to lie I was kind of awkward trying to talk her but, hell it had been a while since I had initiated trying to spend time with someone socially. The other person I was spending time with initiated the idea of spending time socially. Now before this goes off the rails and people start thinking this is a love story, I'll clarify. It was something so much simpler just someone trying to make a friend, so they didn't feel so lonely and trapped. It may sound stupid but without all those small meetings for cigars which were in themselves small victories I don't think I would have gotten to this point. Over time I started feeling more comfortable spending time with them and those things I had been telling myself in the morning and night didn't seem like lies anymore. One day I woke up drank a cup of coffee with a cig and it wasn't till about halfway through I realized I had skipped my dark morning ritual and then I realized I had skipped it for a few days the night one to. It had stopped so gradually I didn't even notice right away. Wasn't long till I was starting to have hopes and dreams again. I tell this story for two reasons for those of you who feel lost and hopeless it can get better and for those not struggling it took someone reaching out to me for the change to start. This story could have had a very different ending if not for that.
By Thelomanious Skorinko5 years ago in Psyche
9 Ways to Deal With Depression
Growing up, I can remember having many bouts of depression. For whatever reason, I would feel so hopeless and powerless to my outside circumstances. Having this victim mentality did not help me at school or at home. I ended up visiting many different psychologists and psychiatrists who tried to assess my psyche. I also ended up taking various medications like Stratera and Concerta. I don't wish depression on anyone and I am happy to say I made it through. It was not without difficulty, but it was all worthwhile.
By The Breatharian Blogger5 years ago in Psyche
Mental Health; A losing battle?
It comes with a heavy heart, to report the death of a man so young whose life was full of such ambition and potential. On Wednesday October 15th, it was reported to my partner that a former work colleague and acquittance had sadly passed away at the young age of 31.
By Kayleigh Taylor5 years ago in Psyche
How Ketamine Practically Cured my Depression
Special K, Kit Kat, Super K, you've probably heard of the drug ketamine, commonly used as an anesthetic since 1962 and as a horse tranquilizer, but what you might not know is that ketamine has a 75% of successfully treating severe depression.
By Christine Johnson5 years ago in Psyche
Seasonal Affective Disorder is Not a Myth...
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) aka Seasonal Depression: Many of you have most likely noticed, at one point in time or another (or maybe even consistently,) in yourself or someone you know, mood changes that seem to be brought on by the end of the warm and sunny Summer months and the onset of shorter, cooler days. The irritability or lack of motivation is too easily and too often brushed off as “the winter blues,” or a “seasonal funk” that people view as something totally normal that comes and goes, and likely feel that it is something that a person simply must deal with.
By Lauren MacDonald5 years ago in Psyche
Depression feels like Drowning
*WARNING* This is mostly a sad post and I want to express my feelings through writing. Sometimes it may go of balance but the point is still there. Meaning it can sometimes sound like a poem. (Just letting you guys know! I’m sorry ahead of time😭)
By Nahla White5 years ago in Psyche
