My First Encounter with Jesus

I have debated, over and over again on whether or not this was something I would ever speak about in my life. I have always been the black sheep of my family. They are cold and logical, where as I tend to lean on the more emotional, empathetic side of things. I have been made to doubt my own memories and realities at times. I think that is why I have been hesitant to speak of this memory, of the first time I met Jesus.

My maternal grandmother would often tell me how we come from a line that is blessed with certain abilities, she wouldn't phrase it in those terms but that is how I've come to view it. I have always remembered being given visions of certain things, that that don't always make sense until they are happening and I get that intense feeling of deja-vu. I also have a an immense intuition I would call it. There are things that I know without having the typical "evidence" for.

It wouldn't be til many years after that I would be able fully articulate what I experienced.

I was a young child. I had been unwell, and started to run a fever. I remember laying in my mothers bed at the time, but from there I only remember it in blurs, my mothers bed, being in one of my parents lap as they drove me to the hospital and then having met Jesus and then just afterwards. The fever had cause me to start to have a febrile seizure.

I remember I did not feel as though I was in my body, as if I had stepped out of it.

I looked into an upper corner of the room and I saw what looked like a glowing golden light in the form of star, that immitted such a feeling of warmth and safety. The voice that echoed through had wrapped me in comfort.

As I have gotten older I think of this experience often. I often wonder myself if this was real or just a dream, but I can never bring myself to say it was a mere dream. I couldn't recall a single word that was said, however I can remember the peace it brought me.

It wasn't until I dived into my own spirituality that I would come to realize who's voice I had heard from the light, the only one who could truly hold such a power of love and light. Jesus.

I don't know if I subconciously remember the conversation, or if maybe someday I will be allowed to know what we had discussed, but atleast for now I remember the feelings behind it, and I think those were what I was meant to remember as a guide throughout my life on how to know what comes from God, and what does not. And to be able to tell others, and truly know its truth, that Jesus really does love you, wants to comfort you, to be your warmth and safety.

I couldn't image not having a relationship with Jesus. I think that memory of mine will always be why I will always be one to chase after him. I will always say, let him love you the way he has loved me, and I promise you you won't regret it.