Interview with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Today, I interview a great scientist who’s discoveries have made his local village proud. He’s a scientist with an alter ego. He’s no poet, but he has written a lot of scientific papers, and many great poems and stories have been written about him, and he’s had several major Hollywood movies produced about his life.

He’s a man who’s story is forever enshrined in mystery and terror, and who’s eldritch and horrifying life has captured the attention of many.

He’s a humble man who’s not afraid to drink dangerous potions! His soft skin possibly requires many lotions.

He’s here to tell us what poems and stories deserve accolade's. Some call him a mad man who drinks poison he retrieved from a well. Others say he’s a genius and invents things that are swell! Let us give a warm welcome to Dr. Jekyll, and, god willing, his alter ego Mr. Hyde.

Some of his test subjects, (cough cough) I mean experiments, have been a big part of the vocal community and have contributed many great and dark stories about the scientist. Some are true, others are fabrications. And now Dr. Jekyll wants to set the record straight! So let’s pay our respect to this wonderful scientist and his egregiously angry other half!

Alex H. Mittelman: I hear you’re thinking about joining the vocal community, Dr. Jekyll. Is this true? And why?

Dr. Jekyll: I need a new place to publish my scientific research. The last place to publish my works went out of business. Not as many readers of boring, peer reviewed medical studies now a days. And I need a good source of income so I can coninue to make my potions. I love my potions. Some call me addicted to my potions, I just call it potion love. Then again, I’m usually very ambivalent.

A.H.M. What is your point of view politically, if I can ask?

D.J. I vote for anyone who is pro science. Global warming is happening and vaccines work, damn it. I hate these raging idiots running around, claiming the opposite. Don’t be dumb. People who don’t know global warming is happening are complete imbeciles. And morons.

A.H.M. I couldn’t agree more. That’s totally right!

Also What do you think of Robert Luis Stevenson?

D.J. He wrote a somewhat accurate account of what happened to me. Except I didn’t die in the end, I invented a potion that made me live forever. I only pretended to die so those pesky lawyers would stop harassing me. I just wish Mr. Hyde and I could make peace and get along. I enjoy turning into Mr. Hyde when he doesn’t destroy my other experiments. But I’m probably boring you with this. Unless you want me to finish the story?

A.H.M. Yes, please do. What exactly happened between you guys?

D.J. Well, at first we got along great. I vaguely remembered his exploits and it felt good letting my dark side out. But then he decided he wanted to be Mr. Hyde all day, destroy everything, beat up all the villagers, and never let me, poor Dr. Jekyll, out again. I mean, a little violence on occasion is one thing, but what he was doing was wanton. It was sheer madness. So I had to adjust the formula for my potion to make sure it would never permanently turn me into Mr. Hyde before Mr. Hyde figured out he could keep drinking potions consecutively. Now I can only drink a potion once every twenty four hours or it won’t work, and at most I transform for an hour to let all my violent urges out. But because Mr. Hyde can’t be Hyde all day long, he hates me.

A. H. M. Tell me about where you live in London?

D.J. It’s foggy.

A.H.M. Let’s talk about your writing career! What’s your favorite kind of poetry or story to write? And why?

D.J. Anything scientific. It’s terrific. I can be very prolific. Let me be specific, science in the pacific is analytic. Get with it!

A.H.M. How did you first discover an interest in science? And why did that inspire you to start writing poetry and short stories.

D.J. I was nine years old and was a very angry child. At first, I took my anger out on the walls. Then the poor maids got their share of beatings. I broke several expensive antiques around the house. At first my wealthy parents didn’t care because everything I broke was replaceable. But then one day they leaned in to give me a hug and I smacked the both of them so hard their heads almost fell off, so they decided to send me to live with the most patient people on Earth, Buddhist monks. They taught me how to repress and control my rage. While I learned patience, I was still moderately angry on the inside. So when they’d go to sleep, I’d do ‘experiments’ on them to see if I could teach them rage. I’d wake them up every fifteen minutes. My experiments might have failed, never once did they get angry at me, but it was then my interest in science and experimentation was born. Then, when I discovered my potion to turn myself into Mr. Hyde, my violent and impulsive urges could finally be released, and I wasn’t to blame. For I was, for all legal and moral purposes, someone else!

A.H.M. What inspires you to write your stories?

D.J. I want to live in infamy. Ha ha ha. I mean, I enjoy explaining science to idiots. I mean simpletons. I mean students. Totally what I meant to say. I love teaching science to students. They’re the future, after all!

A.H.M. Are there any famous poets or writers you like to read, or that you find inspirational? Like Edgar Allen Poe, Oscar Wild or Maya Angelou?

D.J. I like Mary Shelly. She’s a good, inspirational epiphany of a person. She’s great! You should read her work!

A.H.M. Maybe! That sounds like a plan. Is there anything you like to read on Vocal?

D.J. Yes.

(12 seconds of silence passes)

A.H.M. Um… what specifically do you like to read?

D.J. You know, the usual. Anything in the psyche or pride section. Mental health is important, and so is pride! Also, I absolutely love reading the potent articles.

A.H.M. How would you define your writing style? Is there one piece you wrote that you like the best? Why?

D.J. I write very analytically. I wrote a piece on emotional transformation, once. I would never… hide… that research from anyone. That’s my favorite.

A.H.M. What’s been the most challenging thing for you to write and why?

D.J. The loss of control over Mr. Hyde. I really like the guy and his wanton violence, I really do. I just wish I could get him under control. Sorry if I sound lugubrious. I just wish I could get the old him back, the one that would allow me to keep my own property in tact and not destroy the other experiments.

A.H.M. That’s really sad and interesting! Thank you for sharing. What is your most important piece of advice to other scientists and writers?

D.J. Don’t give up. Always keep improving. Edit your work. And smile.

A.H.M. That’s great advice. What do you want people to learn from your work overall?

D.J. How to transcend your own personal boundaries. And how to skillfully craft your own potions. Also, how to sell cleaning supplies. That’s important, that’s how I raise extra money when need be for any new experiments. It’s a great side gig.

A.H.M. Can you tell me what your writing process looks like? Tell me how you get your ideas, when you start writing, what your mood and thought process is, etc.

D.J. My ideas just come to me out of seemingly nowhere. I could be in a good mood or horrible mood, and I think of the most whimsical things. I’m a genius, I guess.

A.H.M. What’s one thing you love about writing?

D.J. The words. I like writing the words. Words are good.

A.H.M. What’s something you hate about writing?

D.J. The time it takes away from me spending time with my precious science. Writing can be very time consuming.

A.H.M. How long has writing been a passion of yours?

D.J. Since I started experimenting. I love writing about my experience with experiments.

A.H.M. Understandable. What do you like to do for fun?

D.J. Experiment. And transform. And do the dishes. I love cleaning dishes.

A.H.M. Is there anything else you think your fans should know about you?

D.J. When I’m Dr. Jekyll I’m friendly like a freckle. But when I’m Mr. Hyde, look out! I’ll throw a pout! Especially if I’ve drunk one to many stouts!

A.H.M. Thank you for letting me interview you!

D.J. Thanks for having me, Alex! It’s been great!

A.H.M. Now to interview Mr. Hyde, if I can. Could you drink your famous potion?

D.J. Are you sure? Well, ok, then.

Dr. Jekyll gulps down his body changing potion in front of me, then he fell on the floor and morphed into the short, hairy angry little creature known as Mr. Hyde.

A.H.M. So, Mr. Hyde, tell me about…

Mr. Hyde pulled out his cane and started beating me.

A.H.M. Ouch, Mr. Hyde. That’s not very nice! Can we… ugh, ufff, ouch!

Mr. Hyde. I HATE YOU AND I HATE INTERVIEWS. And WHY would you interview that eldritch, old and horrible Jekyll fellow first. He’s a twit.

Mr. Hyde continued to beat me with his cane until I was left with no choice but to run out the door screaming for the police. At least I got to ask half a question.