advice
Dating, married, single, divorced, and more. Advice on the relationships you have in life. Dear, Humans..
How to Recognize Toxic Relationships and Break Them Off
In the process of building communication, a person with normal self-esteem wants to get support and be filled with energy. But, as practice shows, this is not always the case. After talking with some people, there is a feeling of emptiness, irritation and frustration. These are clear signs of a toxic relationship.
By Kori Anderson7 years ago in Humans
Comparison Is Not Healthy
I guess by now this is not news to you; you’ve probably been told a lot of times to not compare yourself to others, and the same goes for your relationship. If you haven't heard it before, well, news flash: do not compare yourself to others. Now before you get all defensive or sensitive, comparing yourself to someone is not the same as looking to someone for inspiration, or guidance. You know, social media whether we like it or not, has a very strong influence on us, even the things we think we come about originally, probably has its source deep rooted in something we saw on social media.
By Chimdi Chime7 years ago in Humans
How to Know if You Can Trust Someone...
Trust is the foundation of every healthy relationship. Without trust, relationships will crumble. But while you’re in the dating process (i.e. pre-relationship), it can be hard to determine if the person you just met can be trusted.
By Heart Centered Universe7 years ago in Humans
Why Can't I Make Friends in My 20s?
Friendship is something we go through life yearning for. It's something we need, and a lot of us can say we have it, or at least we did. I'm 22 years old, when I was 18, I had a squad of Taylor Swiftian proportions. There were parties, road trips, vacations, and talks that went on till four AM. Now, my squad is looking a bit depleted, namely, I could count them on one hand.
By Eva Claire7 years ago in Humans
The Inner Divide of PMDD
Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder has a long list of symptoms associated with it. Perhaps one of the most disconcerting to our sense of self is the division it can create within our perspective. When we are symptom free, for example, our relationships can hum along even in the face of difficult challenges. Bring on the symptoms, though, and all of a sudden our tolerance for any trouble evaporates to the point of wishing for and sometimes acting on our freedom from those same relationships. Friends look like enemies. Lovers look like cheaters. Family becomes a target.
By Cheeky Minx7 years ago in Humans
Discover Yourself First
Have you ever found yourself question things about yourself, due to another person's actions or words? When you know the facts about yourself, worries and wonders should not run across your mind. If you think you need to acquire truth about you, throw yourself into the world, surround yourself with different people, try unusual things, and broaden your horizons.
By Moranda Breaux7 years ago in Humans
My Life Bible
This is part one. I don't know who needs this but for someone out there who does, this is for you. Know that it's mature to take care of your emotional welfare, as well as ensuring there are boundaries and a basic understanding of what you need to enable you to become your best self. It's not rude or cruel and it doesn't mean that you aren't a nice person. It means that you are putting yourself first and making your life the priority to ensure that, emotionally and mentally, you are where you need to be—which is what everyone should do. Time is an amazing buffer for raw emotions. No matter what those emotions are or the situation that provoked those feelings, use time wisely. Process what is happening and use time to think clearly before deciding what to do next. Don't rush the process, a moment of patience is sometimes all you need to think clearly. Let it take as long as it is needed or as long as life intends it to be. Don't become fixated with the fantasy you have on repeat in your head. It is shaped by good memories and false hope. Stop predicting or controllingand enjoy each moment as it comes. It distorts the reality and truth you are facing. It brings you out of touch with reality. Stay true to yourself and the situation. Choose forgiveness. This is usually what people struggle with the most. When someone you care and love for hurts you it breaks the trust you had. You ponder how you could have cared for someone who could betray you so effortlessly, and you question whether you even knew that person at all. As cheesy as it is, in order to be at peace with someone or a situation, you must first find peace within yourself. Sometimes taking the perspective of the person who hurt or disappointed you can help. Choose to understand why they did what they did. Choose to see what they did as a reason for why it wasn't meant to be, and not unkind. Choose to see that they did their best for a time, but ultimately it wasn't good enough for you—and that's fine. It's easier to forgive someone when you see them as a human being who isflawed instead of the idea that they are perfection. I've always struggled with whether or not to forgive. It's always ended up with me asking myself, "Is it the mature thing to forgive? Is it more mature to get over it, not hold a grudge, and move on with my life? Or am I not being man enough to put my foot down by always reminding that person of what they did. Essentially does forgiving them make me a weak person?"But in reality forgiving that person is not excusing them for their bad behaviour. You can still be a strong person who's stands up for themselves, tells the person what they did was wrong, and then proceed to forgive them. At the end of the day this isn't about your ego, it's about giving yourself emotional freedom because you are the only one who can give yourself closure from someone or a situation. Understand that there is nothing wrong with you for loving, caring and holding onto good memories with someone who is no longer in your life—simply because there isn't. It's okay to love or care for an ex or an old friend. Hold onto the good memories and don't let the bitterness consume you.Acknowledge that was then and this is now. You are now living separate lives but you don't forget the good times you shared. It's still part of your life, just not your present life. It works both ways. It's also okay to still feel the pain. It's okay to want another ending instead of the one you were given. That's all part of the process of moving on. Just know that love and a good heart/soul isn't what solely makes a relationship or friendship work. They work when you both communicate clearly and honestly, you share the same values and when timing ensures everything falls into place.Sometimes the best way you can express your love to someone is wishing them the best with their life, especially if that means letting them go. Letting someone you love or care for go is not easy at all. However, it's essential that you don't let the love you have for that person compromise the most important relationship of them all—the one with yourself.
By Lewis Embleton7 years ago in Humans
It's Never Too Late to Say Thank You or Sorry
Have you ever been in a situation where a friend or a colleague you are close to does something for you, and you don’t thank them, because you’re used to them? Or in a situation where you did or said something not so nice to your friend, and you don’t apologize for it immediately after because, again, you are used to them? Well I think most of us have.
By Chimdi Chime7 years ago in Humans
Communication Tools That Save Relationships
In society, over the past decade, there have been important changes. Considering how fast our lives are these days, and the amount of work and information we encounter, every day leaves us drained. Most people don’t have the energy to treat themselves, let alone their partner. So the conflict rises and the quarrel intensifies. Here are a few tips on how to work through these periods without destroying the relationship.
By Amelia Flynn7 years ago in Humans
Get to Know Him
I engage in conversations with women daily, at work, on the phone, while out shopping, etc. I am a talker as well as a great listener. I pay attention to people words and actions. I recall a conversation I had a few months ago with a young lady that I’ve known for seven or eight years now. The conversation was about her not allowing her kids to see their father. I know the young lady and the father of her children extremely well, in fact, I remember telling them when they first got involved with each other that they weren't right for one another.
By Moranda Breaux7 years ago in Humans
Patience in a Relationship
To make a relationship work, you have to be willing to do things that you would not normally do, and if you are in love with your partner, those things may be effortless for you to do. But realistically, sometimes you may not be very keen to do them; that’s a relationship, everything isn’t always rosy. Sometimes when we start a relationship or are about to, we already have the “perfect” relationship in mind, we know how we want our partner to be, we know what we want them to do, and what we will do for them. In other words, we’ve already created a relationship in our minds before we even begin it in real life. When we do begin a relationship and things aren't the way we thought, we get disappointed, and this very well happened to me. It’s the expectations we set for other people that creates room for disappointment. If you don’t expect it, you can't be disappointed by the lack of it.
By Chimdi Chime7 years ago in Humans
