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Love That Defies Logic.

When Forgiveness Transcends Theory and the Holy Spirit Leads Beyond Reason.

By TestPublished 9 months ago 3 min read

We live in an age of information. Every scroll, every click, every headline promises to explain something — human behavior, relationships, trauma, boundaries, healing. There's a theory for everything. We’ve become fluent in psychology, sociology, and self-help. We quote attachment styles like scripture, we name toxic traits faster than we name virtues, and we’ve learned how to diagnose pain, cut ties, and create safe spaces. There is wisdom in that. There is protection in that. But sometimes, love breaks all the rules.

I want to talk about a love that doesn’t make sense — the kind that doesn’t fit neatly into a TED Talk or an Instagram carousel. The kind that makes people tilt their heads when they hear your story and say, “Wait, you did what?”

Let me be clear: this is not a call to re-enter abusive situations or deny the necessity of boundaries. It is a reflection on something much rarer, more mysterious — when God calls you to forgive and even love someone who has hurt you deeply. Not theoretically, not abstractly, but actually. Sometimes, in very rare and sacred moments, He even calls us to reconnect.

If you don’t know God, if you’ve never walked with Jesus or read the Bible, this might sound dangerous, even foolish. And to be honest, sometimes it feels that way, even to those of us who do believe. Because love without discernment can look like naivety. Forgiveness can be confused with enabling. But when it’s God who calls you, it’s not based on emotion or moral pressure. It’s not about being “the bigger person.” It’s a Spirit-led, deeply disruptive peace that overrides your understanding.

There’s a passage in Scripture that says, “Lean not on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5). That’s the part that gets me every time. My understanding — shaped by books, therapy, life experience, and yes, heartbreak — tells me to stay away. To let go. To move on. And in most cases, that’s exactly what we should do. But what happens when God whispers, go back? Speak again. Forgive again. Love again.

What if the theories we’ve built our lives on aren’t wrong, but simply incomplete?

There’s another truth that can coexist with our wisdom: God sometimes asks His people to do things that make no logical sense. Hosea married a woman who kept leaving him. Joseph forgave brothers who sold him into slavery. Jesus loved us while we were still enemies. Over and over again, Scripture presents a kind of love that confounds reason — a love that comes not from a careful calculation, but from communion with the Holy Spirit.

Now, none of this erases the reality that people are who they are. A fox is a fox. A lion is a lion. And discernment is a gift. Sometimes God tells us to walk away and stay away. But every once in a while, He does something unexpected. He leads us right back into the presence of the person who wounded us — not to relive the pain, not to pretend it didn’t happen, but to reveal His power through our forgiveness.

That’s what happened to me.

I made a decision — not from sentiment, but from prayer — that I would love them. Not because they deserved it. Not because I forgot what happened. But because God instructed it, and His Spirit confirmed it. And so I laid down my cleverness, my caution, my need to be “right,” and I loved. I forgave. And in that space, I found healing I didn’t know I needed.

This love isn’t glamorous. It doesn’t always result in reconciliation. It doesn’t always make headlines. But it’s holy. It’s counter-cultural. And it’s possible — not through strength or strategy, but through surrender.

So to the person reading this who feels the pull — that still, small voice asking you to love someone you have every reason to forget — I say this: Ask God. Listen closely. He will not lead you where He will not sustain you. And if He calls you to that illogical love, know that you’re not crazy. You’re just walking by the Spirit.

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