Every The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror - Rated and Ranked (Part Two)

And I'm back with Part Two of my review and rating of every single Treehouse of Horror episode of The Simpsons. If you aren't familiar with the basics, feel free to check out Part One right here. Otherwise, let's move right on to checking out the next episode on the list -

Treehouse of Horror VII (Season 8, Episode 1)

Treehouse of Horror VII features a super fun cold open, which almost makes up for the lack of Marge. Her introductory warnings had to come to an end at some point, although they are still sorely missed.

The opening entry from Treehouse of Horror VII, "The Thing and I," has plenty of minor references to other works, but it is largely an original creation of The Simpsons. It is also particularly memorable for a variety of reasons, and could easily carry an entire episode on its own thanks to the "Evil" Bart's surprising depth as a character.

Another Twilight Zone adaptation is up next in the form of "The Genesis Tub," which loosely retells "The Little People" with a decidedly Simpsons bent. Lisa and Bart's childhood rivalry is on full display here, and while it isn't always fun to watch, it does cement "The Genesis Tub" as another iconic Treehouse of Horror short.

Rather than being based on any specific horror property, "Citizen Kang" is based on the 1996 U.S. presidential election. This makes "Citizen Kang" a unique microcosm that pulls off the nearly impossible feat of remaining watchable even for viewers who have absolutely zero working knowledge of anything that it references. Unfortunately, "Citizen Kang" has become a bit unnerving due to the current political climate, albeit not enough to detract from the episode as a whole.

There's no real closer to Treehouse of Horror VII, but that's okay. It still gets most of a Kang and most of a Kodos.

Treehouse of Horror VIII (Season 9, Episode 4)

Treehouse of Horror VIII is another episode with no classic Marge warning. It does feature a Fox censor being violently murdered, which I'm going to say is more than enough for me to stop worrying about where Marge is at the beginning of these.

"The HΩmega Man" is, unsurprisingly, an adaptation of Richard Matheson's I Am Legend, or more specifically the 1971 feature film adaptation starring Chalton Heston, The Omega Man. Where The Omega Man was a carefully crafted horror experience, "The HΩmega Man" is an overtly cartoonish ride that never quite settles on what it is, though not necessarily for the worse.

"Fly vs. Fly" is indeed a retelling of The Fly, just not the version most sci-fi fans know best. Rather than adapting David Cronenberg's 1986 film, "Fly vs. Fly" adapts George Langelaan's original 1957 short story along with scenes from the 1958 film by director Kurt Neumann. For that alone "Fly vs. Fly" scores extra points, yet the pitch-perfect Lisa-Bart dynamics push it over the top in the best of ways.

Another closing segment inspired by real events rather than any sort of fiction, "Easy-Bake Coven" drops the denizens of Springfield into the middle of the Salem (or Springfield) witch trials. Rather than subjecting numerous innocents to gruesome, untimely demises, "Easy-Bake Coven" turns the the Bouvier sisters into actual witches and gives Marge, Patty, and Selma the chance to take credit for the creation of Halloween in its modern incarnation.

Another good Treehouse of Horror that gets another Kang and Kodos with just a little bit off the top.

Treehouse of Horror IX (Season 10, Episode 4)

Treehouse of Horror IX is one my favorite openings from these early-ish seasons of The Simpsons. It is by far the fullest rendition of the classic opening title sequence yet, not to mention one of the most entertaining.

Kicking things off in terms of shorts is "Hell Toupée," an adaptation of the Amazing Stories episode of the same name from 1986. Fortunately for The Simpsons, the "Hell Toupée" from Treehouse of Horror IX is better than the original in every single way. It's funny, scary, and charming in equal measure, whereas Amazing Stories' "Hell Toupée" was really only worth the few minutes that saw Cindy Morgan and James Avery step into frame.

"Hell Toupée" is followed by "The Terror of Tiny Toon," which somehow remains more popular than the film it is based on, 1992's Stay Tuned, which is one of those movies that people say is "criminally underrated" when what they mean is "suffered for being technically ahead of its time and could probably use a remake." While "The Terror of Tiny Toon" is definitely funny at times, the majority of the short is imbued with a sense of panic that The Simpsons excels at capturing when it feels the need.

If the final segment from Treehouse of Horror IX, "Starship Poopers," sounds like it would be an animated riff on Starship Troopers, then you're right. It does sound like that. It is also definitely not evocative of Starship Troopers in any meaningful way. To quote my notes on the "Starship Poopers," : "Where is this going? OH MY GOD! In the alley!? Mag-alien?!"

Treehouse of Horror IX is solid all around, and for that it gets most of a Kang and an entire Kodos.

Treehouse of Horror X (Season 11, Episode 4)

Treehouse of Horror X doesn't celebrate the tenth entry in the anthology series with the return of Marge, although it does play things up a bit. This time around, Kang and Kodos provide the intro via a variety show bit that is especially charming, and sets up the format even if there aren't any additional interludes starring our animated hosts.

"I Know What You Diddily-Iddily-Did" kicks things off, giving Ned Flanders the opportunity to step into the boots of the I Know What You Did Last Summer franchise's infamous Fisherman. Things take a drastic turn when Flanders sheds his raincoat for the pelt of a werewolf, all while continuing to up the ante in terms of how twisted the Treehouse of Horror series can make the character.

The second that I saw the title card for "Desperately Xeeking Xena," I was whisked back to my childhood. It isn't just that I love Xena dearly and adore Lucy Lawless as a person, nor that it plays into beloved comic book tropes, it is that this specific segment was burned into my brain for how oddly endearing it is. Seeing Lucy Lawless on The Simpsons is neat, and seeing Comic Book Guy become a genuinely disturbing villain is great, but seeing Bart and Lisa tackle the likes of Saddam Hussein and Nazi war blimps is peak late '90s entertainment.

Treehouse of Horror X's last segment, "Life's a Glitch," is particularly timely in that it hinges on the purported threat of the Y2K disaster, which never came and faded into the corner of the realm of obscurity where younger generations are unlikely to have any knowledge of it whatsoever. It's also a lot. The plot jumps around and takes wildly abrupt turns that, while enjoyable, ultimately make "Life's a Glitch" less memorable than other Treehouse of Horror entries.

Treehouse of Horror X was probably a lot better when it first aired, and for that it still gets a whole Kang, even if it's only getting about half of a Kodos.

Treehouse of Horror XI (Season 12, Episode 1)

Treehouse of Horror XI starts things off with a bang as The Simpsons become The Munsters for the episode's title sequence. And that's about as good as this episode gets.

Treehouse of Horror XI isn't bad, but it certainly isn't great, either. "G-G-Ghost D-D-Dad," another original opening short, kills off Homer so that he can try to redeem himself in death and earn his place in Heaven. He does not, and the road he takes that ultimately leads him to Hell is only good for a chuckle here and there.

"Scary Tales Can Come True" seems like it might give audiences an anthology-within-an-anthology experience, but it instead translates specific concepts and characters from numerous Brothers Grimm fairy tales to moderate success. Once again, the sibling dynamic between Lisa and Bart steals the show, and viewers can feel it. "Scary Tales Can Come True" is, by a wide margin, the best short here.

"Night of the Dolphin" manages to combine elements from The Day of the Dolphin, The Birds, and Jaws into something that is simultaneously unforgettable and immensely uninteresting. "Night of the Dolphin" has a lot going for it, which is probably why it isn't better all around.

I don't dislike Treehouse of Horror XI, I'm just not in a rush to rewatch any of it. Kang is showing up for this one. Kodos is too, he just as to leave early because of, um... Space... stuff.

Treehouse of Horror XII (Season 13, Episode 1)

Once again, the opening sequence, this time starring Mr. Burns and Smithers, is phenomenal. Once again, the rest of this Treehouse of Horror is not as good. As a matter of fact, the rest of Treehouse of Horror XII is bad, and as much as I don't want to admit that, it just is. A lot of people say that Season 12 is where The Simpsons started to decline in quality, but Season 13 is where the Treehouse of Horror became in desperate need of repair.

Treehouse of Horror XII begins with "Hex and the City," which is basically Thinner but worse. And I don't mean it's worse than the novel, which it is, or that it's worse than the movie, which it is, I mean "Hex and the City" is worse than however bad readers who saw the movie or read the book 20 years ago remember them being, which says so much without me having to come out and say it.

In "House of Whacks," the Simpson family upgrade their home into a new smart house that Marge programs to sound like Pierce Brosnan and quickly turns evil. I jotted down "this sucks" in my notebook while I was watching this one, which was accompanied by "no interludes," so take from that what you will.

"Wiz Kids" closes out Treehouse of Horror XII with a Harry Potter adaptation that leans into gross-out humor to a degree that is rarely seen on The Simpsons and continues to not land for obvious reasons. This isn't to say that gross-out humor is bad, just that what we get from "Wiz Kids" is mostly either flatly boring or blatantly misplaced, whereas the rest of the segment flounders save for a few half-decent moments.

Kang and Kodos both stopped by to say "hi" and then showed themselves out. Seriously, I don't remember them being anywhere besides the wedding scene from "Hex and the City," and I refuse to rewatch this episode in order to verify that notion.

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I can't believe I'm ending this on such a sour note. I really do love Treehouse of Horror, y'all, I promise. I'll be back tomorrow to write about more of them, and remember to keep checking in as I cover every Treehouse of Horror leading up to Halloween.