Anger Management

"When a man is unable to confront sadness, he retreats to anger." - Terrence Real

Although the majority of negative emotions are avoided in contemporary society, fury is not one of them. It is somewhat idolized in films, games, and even novels. It is typically the source of energy that a character, usually male, employs to advance in their mission.

Anger is an entirely wholesome aspect of the human experience. It is typically employed when our boundaries are being infringed upon. Genuinely, this is the manner in which wrath is intended to be employed. Without this form of anger, we become spineless cowards and are exploited by others.

Unhealthy fury is characterized by the act of expressing one's frustrations toward others at inopportune times or toward individuals who are unrelated to the situation. Additionally, we observe rage when we tilt in response to not receiving what we believed was ours, a phenomenon that is prevalent in online games.

Chronic anger is the result of unreasonably lofty expectations that are not met, which leads to an outburst that is directed at this injustice. In a sense, this is paradoxically associated with elevated anxiety levels, as individuals experience a sense of powerlessness in the face of circumstances and events that are beyond their control.

Anger induces a binary mindset, as well as tunnel vision. This is beneficial in a flee or fight scenario; however, it is entirely unhelpful in any other circumstance. If we are unable to discern the error in our actions or the validity of the other individual's assertions, we inevitably exacerbate the situation.

It is crucial to remember that you are in control of your emotions, and as such, you have the ability to control your anger if you believe the situation is not appropriate for you to be furious. Conversely, you are unable to regulate the wrath of others, and to a greater extent, you may not be aware of the actual cause of their anger. Therefore, regardless of whether you are attempting to manage your own wrath or that of another individual, it is crucial to comprehend the source of the anger. Among all other things, anger can lead us astray.

Take a deep breath and count to 10 when you sense hostility brewing. This will assist you in regaining composure and revaluating the entire situation. If you are so angry at a loved one that you feel the need to leave the room, state to them, "I am extremely upset with you at the moment and am unable to communicate with you. I will be able to do so in [x] hours." Subsequently, you refrain from communicating with them until that time has transpired. Nevertheless, it is mandatory to communicate with them at least once after that period has elapsed to request an extension. However, the objective is not to continue to extend the time, but rather to take a break and gather one's thoughts. In this manner, you are not isolating them entirely, and they are aware that, despite your current frustration, you will not abandon them and abandon them. It also provides them with the opportunity to reflect and calm off. It also prevents them from feeling like the "bad guy," as they are not the bad guy, nor are you the bad guy; rather, you have a disagreement and the problem is the bad man.

This method of reframing one's thoughts and, consequently, their actions are frequently employed in therapy sessions with a psychologist. If you are under the impression that you require therapy due to your inability to regulate your emotions or thoughts, it is recommended that you consult with a psychologist. This book is not a substitute for a therapy session.