How the lion lost its roar

Have you ever seen a magnificent lion or lioness in the wild that’s lost its ability to roar? Picture it now; a strong, confident leader full of energy completely desolate and downtrodden.

I was that lion that lost its roar. Being a Leo, I am very outgoing, bubbly and social but I got too caught up in a relationship and completely lost who I was. I was stripped of every essence of my personality that makes up who I am and I felt like an empty shell of who I used to be and who I could be. I lost my voice, I lost my confidence, I lost my personality, I lost my sense of humour, I lost my happiness but most upsettingly I lost my sense of self-worth and self-love. All of this happened so slowly over the 6-year relationship that I never noticed it happening until I got to the end and didn’t recognise who I saw in the mirror anymore.

Once I was out of the relationship I saw how far down the cliff of misery and self-destruction that I had fallen that I could not fathom how I could have given so much of myself away to be left with nothing at the end.

Slowly, I had to rebuild from scratch and work out who I was without my whole life and future being tied to one individual and one relationship. I am proud to say that I am now more confident, more outgoing and more social than I ever was before. I learnt to love myself and to be conscious of the worth I attach to myself- no one has the power to devalue myself worth. I know I definitely could not have done it alone and I am eternally grateful for all those people who stuck their hand out and helped pull me up.

I had to go back to my foundations and completely rebuild who I am and what I stand for. I had to move back in with my parents, I reached out to friends I had pushed away and lost contact with and I stripped myself right back. When I felt completely lost, I turned to the stars to help me figure out who I am. Instead of seeing a therapist I started seeing psychics; looking into my birth chart and looking for answers and signs from the universe. I started to cleanse my life of all the negativity and mend relationships that had been broken.

Once I felt more like myself than I ever have before, I wanted to get a permanent reminder of how far I have come to rebuild myself; a permanent reminder of who I am; a permanent reminder to never give away too much of myself and lose myself ever again. I never want to hold on to someone or something so tightly ever again that I lose myself in the process. It is definitely not worth it.

The lion signifies who I am and who I am destined to be; my characteristics. The crown on its head is the reminder to never let anyone (including myself) knock the crown from my head; to always hold my head up high, proud and confident.

I am so grateful to have had the support network of close friends and family to lean on. Never have been one to allow myself to rely on anyone else previously, it was a pleasant surprise that I opened myself up to be vulnerable in front of so many different people that helped lift me up in ways I cannot express.

More than anything, I am proud and ecstatic to say that this Leo has rediscovered her roar and will protect it at any cost.