DEVOUR THE GODS; a snippet

The humans gave chase,

and so the god ran.

-

He ran until the blur

of the trees and the land

melded together like the

broad paint strokes

of a messy child,

and the sky and the streams

reflected one another in

measured confidence.

-

Soon the sky

and the land

would both be

splattered in red.

-

His pursuers were close;

he could sense their

bloodlust like he could

the coming of the sunset.

-

He must decide now

between salvation

and ruin.

-

For mortals, he would choose

a path far more precarious.

-

The land opened up

upon a rain-soaked cliff -

a mouth of darkness and

stone teeth that

welcomed him in,

encouraging rest and reprieve

before the hunters

found their mark.

-

To the center of the cave he went,

sitting neatly upon folded knees,

waiting for that red paint

to come through the darkness.

-

“Is he in here?” a voice called.

It was timid, but eager.

-

“You go in first,” was the reply -

a deeper tenor and yet

even more afraid

than the first.

-

A third broke through them both,

“Move aside! He’s mine.”

Greed was this last hunter’s god -

they would not be happy

with the outcome

of this encounter.

-

The hunter’s footsteps

echoed in the dark,

and all three stepped

out of the shadows

and into the light

filtering down from a hole

in the cave roof.

-

He quickly turned

his back to them -

the mortals who would

dare approach a god.

-

“Qotho? You are him,

are you not?”

-

His name - Qotho -

one not heard spoken aloud

in many a moon.

Had he forgotten it so easily?

-

A hunter spoke once more,

“Qotho, the giver? By right

of the hunt, we have come

to claim what is

rightfully ours!”

-

Qotho parted his lips,

and let loose his voice.

“Giver? I am no such thing.”

-

AUTHOR'S COMMENTS

Hey everyone! So, for context, this project has been sitting on the writing shelves for quite sometime, and it was only recently that I decided to convert it into lyrical prose inspired by one of my favorite books: SONG OF THE SPARROW by Lisa Ann Sandell, which tells its story in this format.

I've got a few chapters written, but only a small amount of that has been turned into prose which is what you see above!

I would LOVE some feedback/thoughts on this format. This is my first attempt at it, and I'd like to know if I'm on the right track or if I need to make some adjustments!

My questions to you are:

1. Would you read something like this? A fictional story told in prose.

2. Does it still read like a narrative story while keeping the flow of a free-form/lyrical poem?

3. Based on your answer to 2, do you think it should lean a little more into the poetry side of things ( less outright descriptions and more metaphor/rhyming/things to make it read more like poetry ) or more into narrative ( more clear and concise action & descriptions ).

Thank you for reading, and thank you for taking time out of your day to provide feedback. It means a lot to us authors!