Killer

l was a big girl who grew up in a wealthy family. I had opened my eyes in a family where there was everything that a person could wish for.

I was a very independent thinker. I used to talk frankly to everyone I met and quickly mix with them.

But I didn't know that one day this very liberal thinking of mine would become a noose around my neck in such a way that I would neither be able to live nor die. Zach was the son of our neighbor's aunt and he was incredibly handsome. He had a fair complexion, a sharp nose, six feet tall, wide chest, and his body, which was in shape due to joining a gym, had increased his beauty even more. I had started loving Zach with all my heart, but I had never been able to tell him this. Zach also knew

that I was interested in him, but he had never talked about it and I had never dared to. I used to talk to Zach until late at night. Our text messages were very extensive, but we were very good friends. One day I didn't know why or what I was thinking. I wrote a long text that contained endless love and affection and sent it to Zach. I was about to text Zach when my whole body went cold.

My hands and feet were drenched in sweat, thinking about what Zach would think.

There was a silence between us for a few minutes. After about five or ten minutes, my cell phone rang.

I quickly grabbed the phone. Zach's name was flashing in front of me in the form of SM. I was also applying the pattern on my cell phones and at the same time praying that the answer was yes, I have come.

May God not forbid him because I had fallen so deeply in love with Zach that even thinking about him from a distance would make my blood pressure drop.

But was this it? On the other hand, Zach also had the same thoughts about me as I had about Zach.

He also wanted me the same way I wanted him. Our friendship took on a new meaning. The spring of love had taken a turn. Love is such a thing. It steps into a barren, desolate, and desolate heart and blooms flowers of hope in it in such a way that the one who sees and listens to it feels very good.

Well, this series of talks and love between us had been going on for two to three years.

My family was looking for a boy for my marriage,

but I felt like it was a sin to even think of anyone other than Zack.

One day, while talking, I told Zack that my family was thinking of my marriage. You should send your mother and father to my house for our relationship so that this bond of love can turn into a married life and we can live together for the rest of our lives.

Hmmm, I think so. After saying this, Zack changed the subject.

I felt a little strange at the time, but thinking that he might be a fool, I ignored him.

But when I kept getting no reply even after saying it again, the thought came to my mind that maybe he was not playing with my feelings and emotions, but I had become so blinded by Zac's love that I was not willing to admit it.

But the truth was that Zac did not love me, but my body.

He had a hunger for my body, which he wanted to destroy and leave me. I realized this only when everything was ruined. After my repeated insinuations, Zac, no matter how much he lied, once agreed to send a gift to my house. I was very happy that I was going to get my love for life,

but fate wanted to tie me up and kill me. It was a Saturday night, which meant yesterday was Sunday and Zac had promised me to send a gift to my mom and dad on Sunday.

It must have been around two o'clock that night when I received an SMS from Zac in which he asked me to come to the roof.

We had gone to the roof like this before. We used to talk a lot in the last hours of the night.

As usual, I went to the roof and as usual, Zach was waiting for me on the roof.

Today, his words were fast. I was surprised, but I was lost in the blindfold of his love and the green gardens he showed me. I could hear his words.

While we were talking, it was four o'clock in the morning and then when, how and why did everything happen that I had never thought of.

I ran to the room crying and screaming and turned off the mobile and locked the room and started crying loudly.

Oh, my house is ruined, what have I done?

Oh, why did I get so lost? I

had lost my virginity.

Out of fear, my feet had left me.

My voice had left me.

After taking five or six sleeping pills at once, I fell face down on the bed. The next evening, when I opened my eyes and

went outside, I saw that it was dark.

I thought that maybe I had just fallen asleep. But I had just opened my eyes,

but no, it was Sunday evening.

All the family members were looking at me in surprise and worry. I wondered what had happened to him that he had become so sleepy,

but I avoided everyone's eyes and didn't answer anyone. I went to the kitchen and took a box of juice from the fridge, poured it into a glass, took the glass and went back to my room.

I put the juice on the bedside table and turned on my mobile.

I thought I would have a long line of SMS and calls from Zach, like before.

Whenever my mobile was off, Zach would go crazy,

but nothing like that happened.

Not even a single SMS from Zach had come, no call, no WhatsApp.

I typed five or six long SMS and sent them, saying, "You were going to come to my house today with a relationship, right? Then why didn't you come?"

But there was no response from the front.

Maybe he loved her so much.

I called her but she would cut my calls.

Tired, I sent her a lot of abusive SMS and voice notes, hoping

that she would reply in anger. But there was no answer and she didn't.

I turned off the SIM and smashed the mobile against the wall.

But what was supposed to happen happened. My conscience was repeatedly reproaching me.

Later, I was found pregnant, which I had to get an abortion to get rid of,

and I strangled a tiny soul before it could enter this world.

My family fixed my marriage.

Finally, after I got married, I settled with my in-laws. I was living a good life. There was no lack of anything or worries. I had a very caring husband. He took great care of me. But how can anyone keep someone who is rejected by fate? One day, my husband received a call from an unknown number and it was Zack's voice on the other end.

The ground beneath me gave way, I became cold.

Zack did what I feared. He told my husband everything, mixing some truths with some lies. It was too late to cut the call.

He didn't even let me see him and divorced me and sent me to Mecca.

It was as if the end of the world had come upon my family.

But parents are parents after all, right?

Today, I have been living in Mecca for ten years.

I also have a child who was raised by his grandparents and lives here.

My world has been shattered.

I would like to give this message to all my sisters:

Love, but loving within limits is not a sin, but if you don't protect your chastity, then you will have to hear the pain and suffering separately and listen to different things like me. Perhaps I felt this was a curse from the same little soul whose throat I had strangled before coming into this world. I am a murderer of souls from a young age. I am a murderer, I am a murderer